open post

[caelus]

i won't just survive. oh, you will see me thrive.

CODE BY TESSISAMESS

Comments

text.

[caelus]

1. Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?

2. I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?

3. The good news is that the fire suppressant system is working just fine. The bad news is I think I'm going to need about five showers cause this stuff is everywhere.

4. Text him!

3

[yeoman]

I have a feeling I'm going to regret asking this, but here we go-

What did you do?

[caelus]

Why is everything my fault?

Why can't it be: huh, this particular heating station was set too high, and I was just trying to help save valuable data?

3

[houseparty]

Yeah that’s sort of the whole point.




Wait why did it go off?

[caelus]

Did you mean to have it set on such a sensitive level?

It was a spark. One spark. Maybe a hint of smoke, barely there, and the next thing I know, I'm doused.

3 with Fleet Captain Pike

[failed_astrophysics]

How much paperwork am I going to have to fill out?

space dad!

[caelus]

That depends on where you rank another shirt and possibly a singed hairline on the paperwork scale.

He's always here to be exasperated.

[failed_astrophysics]

That's not that much....is the ship okay?

happy late father's day???

[caelus]

As a whole: yes. This particular lab: no.

The good news is, I saved all of the data before the consoles ended up too corrupted from damage.

Looool

[failed_astrophysics]

At least that's....something.

1

[poolhall_killer]

Jim there's nothing 'natural' about structural damage with that kind of rigorous activity.

[or: hello Venom still has no sense of humor or adventure]

[caelus]

Sure there is. It's a very natural act between two people. My sink just wasn't ready for that.

I think my ass is bruised.

[ One day, Venom. Jim'll have to have enough for the both of them. If he can survive Spock, he can survive his former assassin boyfriend. ]

[poolhall_killer]

[You did manage to make him smile by mentioning the ass bruise. Good work!]

Fair enough.

But we cannot have your backside bruised. Would you like for me to get some ice for it?

[caelus]

[ Hey, small victories! ]

I don't know what's more damaging to my ego, admitting the ass bruise or having to put ice on it.

It's still kind of funny though.

[poolhall_killer]

There is no shame in admitting you need treatment, even if it's a bruise in an unmentionable area.

Admittedly, looking back on it, it was rather amusing.

2.

[drinkandfight]

Are you the shot police? Gonna pull me over and write me a citation for unlawful shot-taking?

[caelus]

I just said I was concerned. Not that you weren't allowed to. I just wouldn't recommend doing it with Romulan Ale.

[drinkandfight]

I thought you said you weren't a worry wart.

[caelus]

I'm not. Or I thought I wasn't until I saw that.

1.

[fightlikehell]

please tell me this is a hypothetical. now.

[caelus]

It isn't hypothetical. The good news is that it isn't your sink.

[fightlikehell]

are you asking for legal council?

or you wanna talk to me about things you've fucked

[caelus]

Does the first mean I get to meet you at your office?

We'd be here all day if I started on that. I figure it wouldn't be something you're into.

texting him - i'm so sorry

[mindmeld]

Captain, from the note I received last night, I must assume that you have either been kidnapped by nefarious individuals who would benefit from more education beyond kindergarten, or you broke into Dr. McCoy's stash of confiscated Romulan ale.

I am unclear which is more worrisome.

[caelus]

Please stop texting so loud, Spock. And why does it have to be either? Could be either. Maybe I was attacked by nefarious individuals and I got hit on the head really hard.

Could be that.